Tag Archives: passion

Intimacy vs. Agreement:
“I better not disagree with his point of view, or he’ll get upset.”

Posted on Sunday, February 10, 2013 by Alison

Guessing game: Cycle of fusion People often mistake intimacy with a feeling of closeness and “being one” that comes from all-encompassing agreement and approval, similar to the feeling of falling in love. So in their quest for intimacy, they will … Continue reading →

Posted in Intimacy | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment


Good Conversation:
“We don’t talk much anymore.”

Posted on Friday, November 2, 2012 by Alison

Good conversation has an edge. It opens your eyes to something, stirs your imagination, reverberates in your mind later in the day. Your mind has been sparked. What if you start worrying that the other person will get angry or … Continue reading →

Posted in Communication, Relationship Skills | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Where’s the passion?
“I’ve toned down my dreams, achievements, and spontaneity so I won’t annoy my partner. Now we take each other for granted.”

Posted on Friday, February 24, 2012 by Alison

Consideration vs. catering to weakness To have a fulfilling relationship, you have to learn to speak your truth and become the best person you can be without living in fear of your partner’s reaction. In a reciprocal loving relationship, each … Continue reading →

Posted in Intimacy | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Falling in Love & the Unconscious:
“I’m crazy in love. But friends say I’m setting myself up to be rejected again.”

Posted on Wednesday, January 18, 2012 by Alison

Romantic passion calls forth intensity, excitement, and focus of desire. Intense emotions are generally fueled by psychological “complexes,” that is, heated reactions (positive or negative) to a person or situation reminiscent of a past experience that left a mark on … Continue reading →

Posted in Intimacy | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments

Positive Bonding Patterns:
“We never fight, but we don’t talk anymore and there’s no more passion.”

Posted on Monday, December 19, 2011 by Alison

How often have you heard people say, “I still love him/her, but I’m not in love anymore”? Very often this loss of passion is the result of falling into a “positive bonding pattern” through countless decisions to hide true opinions … Continue reading →

Posted in Intimacy | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Dysfunctional Parents:
“My parents were so dysfunctional, I don’t even know what a good relationship looks like.”

Posted on Thursday, May 19, 2011 by Alison

Whether or not you can or like to dance, dancing together is a perfect metaphor for the many interactions that occur in a relationship. Ask yourself the following questions about your relationship: Do you do the dance of relationship to … Continue reading →

Posted in Intimacy, Relationship Skills | Tagged , , , , , | 3 Comments

“Were you out on the golf course again? I’ve been here alone all afternoon!”

Posted on Monday, May 2, 2011 by Alison

To sustain a long-term passionate relationship, we need to balance two primary drives—the desire for togetherness and the desire for independence and autonomy. While everyone has a different ideal balance point, it’s clear that the extremes of too much togetherness … Continue reading →

Posted in Intimacy, Sports | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments